Couples Therapy Myths: What You’ve Heard vs. What’s True
The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists estimates that about 750,000 people seek out couples therapy each year. While that number focuses on married couples, it’s fair to say that thousands of unmarried couples take advantage of therapy, too.
That might seem like a large number, but when you consider how many couples there are in the U.S. alone, it isn’t as staggering as you might think.
Couples therapy isn’t for everyone, but far too many people steer clear of it because of misconceptions and myths. You’ve likely heard plenty of things about couples therapy, or maybe you’ve just made your own assumptions without much research. By shutting down the idea of attending therapy together without really knowing what to expect, you could be doing yourself and your relationship a disservice.
Let’s take a closer look at some common couples therapy myths and dig deeper into what’s actually true.
Myth: A Therapist Will Take Sides
Some people avoid couples therapy because they think they will somehow be “attacked” or criticized by the therapist. You might also think that the therapist will side with your partner on every subject.
Therapists are supposed to remain neutral throughout your sessions. They aren’t there to take sides or suggest that one person is right and the other is wrong. While they might ask you to see something from your partner’s perspective, they are not there to play the blame game, and you should view couples therapy as a judgment-free zone.
Myth: Couples Therapy Means Your Relationship is Over
It’s true that many couples seek out therapy together when their relationship is in a rocky place. However, that doesn’t mean it should be used as a last-ditch effort to save things.
Can therapy help with everything from communication issues to building intimacy and trust? Yes. Can it set you on a path of healing if something harmful has happened in the relationship? Absolutely.
But, it’s not meant to be a quick fix or a band-aid for your relationship. Many couples attend therapy when they are doing really well together. It’s never a bad thing to improve your communication efforts or focus on things like vulnerability or intimacy. We could all use help in those areas, and you don’t have to wait until your relationship feels unstable to take advantage of the benefits of therapy.
Myth: Therapy Will Fix Your Relationship
While couples therapy can absolutely help to heal your relationship, there is no guarantee it will happen.
Both partners have to be completely committed and willing to make the relationship work. You have to be open to the process of therapy. Even then, some people simply aren’t meant to be together. Couples therapy might end up helping you see that. Sometimes, relationships don’t work out, and the healthiest thing for both partners is to walk away.
With that in mind, it’s important to manage your expectations, especially if you’re trying to save a rocky relationship.
Myth: Therapy Is for the Weak
Unfortunately, this is a common misconception for both individual and couples therapy.
Reaching out for mental health help doesn’t make you weak. In fact, it shows great strength and courage to admit you need help. When it comes to your relationship, it also shows you’re willing to address issues and put in the work to be a better partner.
Don’t let the myths surrounding couples therapy keep you and your partner from getting the help and guidance you deserve. Whether you’re seeking out relationship maintenance or you’re ready to address specific issues, we are happy to work with you. Contact Integrative Psychotherapy Group today to set up a consultation.
